I have had the pleasure of hearing TallGirl and ShirtlessRoland pontificate longer than you’d imagine possible on the skill required to – I’m sorry, there’s no delicate way to put this – flick boogers.  TallGirl’s technique involves wiping the thing back and forth from hand to hand until it’s ready to be flicked from the thumb with the middle finger.  Similarly, ShirtlessRoland launches from the thumb, but with the index finger and only after rolling it around a couple of times.

Why am I telling you this?

Because I have just learned, much to my displeasure, that I am not divorced yet afterall.  No doubt this is nothing more than a legal maneuvering brought on by his paranoia or intention to wiggle out of the settlement he agreed to when he thought I was dying.  Whatever the case, I just wish I could wish him gone.  Funny what time changes.

On the bright side I get to spend another weekend celebrating divorcing him and I imagine it will be twice the fun as the first.  In the meantime, though, there is much frustration and the feeling that I just can’t get rid of him.

Remember kids, you can pick your husbands and you can pick your nose.  But you can’t flick your ex-husbands off your thumb.

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